a Harvest Moon/Pokémon/Sims/Harry Potter/Cardcaptor Sakura/Real Life crossover fanfic
Chapter One - Party
“Soup, Rach. How the hell can you manage to burn soup?”
“’Kay, you know what? Be quiet,” Rachel commanded, pushing her failure-of-a-dinner aside and flopping into one of the dining room chairs. “Maybe I should get Aruto to cook tonight... this sucks.”
Fandi simply rolled her eyes, but didn’t argue. Having Rachel’s blue bird thing with the cottony wings was better than eating burnt soup (of all things) for dinner. Besides, the Altaria was actually a surprisingly good chef.
“Shandershon and them sure are late though,” Rachel commented as she released Aruto from his ball, trying to divert Fandi’s attention from her most recent cooking failure (which seemed to happen a lot these days, much to her chagrin).
“O lol hay thar,” came the loud reply from the front door as their housemates tromped in. “Sorry we’re late,” Sandy continued when she entered the kitchen and dropped a couple (meaning two) bulging plastic bags onto the counter. “It took us a while to find the tapioca, and since food is one the five exceptions to Gamp’s Law of Elemental Trans-”
“はい, はい, わかたよ [yeah, yeah, I get it],” Rachel interrupted, coming over to inspect the contents of the plastic bags. “And I hope you remembered to buy the fish. Sarah’s going to absolutely murder us if we don’t have sushi for her when she gets here.”
“She’s probably going to be ‘fashionably late’ again though,” Fandi said, shrugging, “so we have time.”
Sandy spoke up again. “But if she somehow managed to pass her Apparation test-”
Rachel shook her head. “That girl? Unlikely.”
“-or tear herself away from Malfoy-”
“That’ll take an atomic bomb and several tanks.”
“-then she technically could arrive on time. For once.”
“But will she? No,” Rachel finished, waving a dismissive hand. “And, since I’m clearly incapable of making anything edible for dinner tonight, I think I’ll go upstairs and clean up. This ginormous house has a lot to clean, you know.”
“At least we all get our own rooms,” Jason pointed out, still obviously relieved by this fact. “And I get my very own studio too!”
“Well hey, we’re rich people,” Fandi said happily, “so having a big house and lots of stuff is good! (Even though I own an awesome sports car that I never get to ride in because something that seems suspiciously like a faulty game mechanic makes me ride in a limousine every time I want to go somewhere...)”
“This alternate universe is full of faulty game mechanics and other things that don’t make sense,” Aruto said from the sink, where he was (somehow) washing the fish with his giant wings. “For example, how am I, as a Pokémon, able to communicate normally with you humans? How can you people stuff pianos and sofas and helicopters in your pockets? Why can you catch fish from the local swimming pool? Why are the local farmers around here allowed to play every available member of the opposite sex and not get in trouble for it? Why are Sandy-san and Sarah-san the only people here who can use magic? Do the Sakura Cards actually exist in this universe? How the heck can Rachel burn soup of all things?”
“AY. I CAN HEAR YOU, YA KNOW,” came a loud shout from the upstairs library. Everyone laughed.
“Well, might as well set up the karaoke machine or something.”
Andrea was sad that Hibari Kyouya did not exist in this universe. She wished she were back in Japan in that tiny little cell that was being guarded by Hibari Kyouya, back when RCII was still alive. Then she remembered that she was supposed to be an Andrea from an alternate universe, and that she wasn’t supposed to remember anything about RCII or Hibari Kyouya or Japan.
Either way, she still thought that Sarah’s singing was waaaay off-tune.
Fandi was beginning to regret putting “My Humps” onto the karaoke machine. Yuedi and Sarah and Daryna seemed to enjoy it, though.
“How old are we, exactly?” Angie randomly asked during dinner. (Of course, she was sitting with Skye at one of the small, two-people, “date” dining tables, much to the Phantom Thief’s discomfort. He still wasn’t quite used to dealing with rabid fangirls, even though the existence of an alternate universe implies that he shouldn’t even remember what it was like to be stalked by rabid fangirls in the first place.)
“Maybe in our twenties or something?” Daryna suggested. “Assuming we’re no more than pieces of data in a video game, the deity that created us decided to put us in the “Young Adult” age group so that the adult-exclusive interactions would be available to us immediately, and it would make the game more interesting. Hypothetically speaking,” she added hastily when she saw Tony giving her a strange look.
“I think,” Rachel said slowly, “that a more appropriate question would be... why the hell is Tony here in the first place?!”
“I was hoping you wouldn’t be hungry today,” he said sadly.
“...”
“Stella-ella-ola, quack quack quack, say S cheeko cheeko, cheeko cheeko cha-cha, S cheeko cheeko, below, below, the toilet overflows-”
“It actually did,” Richard informed them as he came out of the bathroom.
“Again?!” Sandy groaned in exasperation. “That means I have to mop up more puddles. Geez...”
“We could always turn debugging mode on and delete them,” Rachel suggested.
“Where’d your Ariados go?”
“That girl’s nocturnal, so I let her out for a stroll.”
“Doesn’t the Pokédex entry say that Ariados eat humans?”
“... Ari likes to knit in her spare time. I highly doubt she’s a normal member of that species.”
---
... Sorry, I'm really bored.
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